I’m not sure what his ethnicity is but, as far as I’m concerned, he’s from a mob family. High up if not the Boss himself. When he walks in a room, it’s with great authority and, if things go as we think it will go, he begins throwing things and swearing up a storm, so much so it’s as if those words have been handed down by generations of sailors. Fear takes over the room and we all hold our breath wondering who he’s going to go after first. I giggle even as I write this because, yes, ladies and gentlemen, I am a fan of Jon Taffer of “Rescue Bar.” A reality show that has captured my attention to the point where I watch an episode (okay 2 episodes) every night.
Jon Taffer is a rescuer of failing bars, specifically the bar owners. And boy do they need to be rescued. Some bars are filthy, some food undercooked or overcooked, many with employees without direction and all serving drinks that are over-poured (which after several weeks I’m now an expert in knowing what that means). But the one thing that all these bars have in common is a bar owner who appears to be lost as to how to run their business. And what makes Jon super sailor-angry is an owner who backs away from owning this, owning their failure.
As much as I know that this show (as true of all reality shows) is produced and edited for entertainment purposes, the one thing that can’t be made up is the inefficiency of each bar and its owner. An owner who clearly knows their business is failing and they’re about to lose it, yet they continue in their failure-producing behavior, repeating their actions over and over again, hoping that something will change.
Which got me thinking - I mean, it IS Monday. It would be so easy to point the finger at these bar owners and say, “Why didn’t you research or reach out to a mentor or at least watch something on YouTube to find out how to be a business owner?” But they didn’t. And I can’t blame them for that.
Because I think back on my life and acknowledge that there were years when I was secretly unhappy. And I say secretly because I didn’t tell anyone. I kept it to myself. I would dream of being happy and feeling free, but that’s as far as I would go. Just dreaming. I could have reached out to someone, I could have sought help, but instead I just kept doing what I was doing over and over and over again just like the bar owners, thinking that if I just keep going, things will change. When really what it was is that I didn’t have the courage to step outside my dysfunctional comfort zone.
Until I did. And it was, by far, the most difficult thing that I have ever done.
It takes a heck of a lot of courage to change. Change behavior, thoughts, responses, attitudes. For me, it began by telling someone that I was desperately unhappy and I needed help. I then went to get counseling to help me choose a different way of thinking and speaking and responding. I set goals for myself on how I would live life differently. And, of course, I prayed, asking God to help me finally live the life that he intended me to live.
And life changed for the good. It took a long time, lots of tears and more perseverance than I thought I had, but I did it. And I still have to do it. Because, believe it or not, occasionally I find myself at it again - keeping an unhappiness secret. But, fortunately, I’m more attentive to God these days, especially when he does his Jon Taffer impression, albeit, a kinder and gentler Jon. And I find myself uncomfortable now living with secrets. I gotta get them out and get help.
And each time that I do, just like the show, day 4 of “Rescue Bar” comes. Everything gets remodeled. From the outside to the inside, and life feels fresh and clean and ready to be lived in a new and healthy way. So on behalf of bar owners and secret keepers everywhere, thank you Jon and thank you God for rescuing us!
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